Here’s a joke I just heard:
A guy goes to a restaurant and orders soup, but drops his spoon on the floor. Instantly the waiter is there, offering him another spoon. The guy takes it and starts eating. He says to the waiter, “Wow. How did you know I was going to drop my spoon?” The waiter says, “We had an efficiency expert come in and give us some tips. One thing he said is that 30% of patrons will accidentally drop their spoons, so now I always carry around a spare in case that happens.” The guy notices a string hanging out of the waiter’s pants zipper and asks what it’s for. The waiter says, “That’s another one of our efficiency measures. The string is tied to the end of my penis. Now I can pull my penis out to pee without touching it, which means I don’t have to wash my hands afterward. It saves a lot of time.” The guy says, “Oh, that’s clever I guess.” Then he thinks for a moment and asks, “But how do you get your penis back into your pants?” “Oh,” the waiter replies, “I usually use the spoon.”
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